Home to Hospital

I had got accustomed to home isolation in the past 9-10 days and tried to do whatever I could with the sort of energy I had. My parents worried for me in a bigger way. Simple activities like brushing teeth, bathing etc. half-depleted my spirit as the days furthered. Loss of taste and smell with almost no appetite or interest in eating, I started to feel a void which worsened due to optional confiscation of interactions. I didn’t feel like conversing. Many of my relatives and a few friends called or texted but I stayed away, can’t say why! On and off, I felt helpless and sad for mummy too, whose workload had increased. She had to do separate chores for me and I knew that the daily ‘stairs up and down’ caused her exertion. She has had a slip disc problem in past and I worried of it reappearing. I also often found myself praying for my family; wishing no one gets infected in any manner. Covid/Corona has been so unpredictable and has a sense of uncertainty over its whole existence. Nevertheless, I felt the best when asleep.

The recent hospital visit to CMC, concluded with fine reports of the multitude of tests taken; except for one, which proved that I was now infected with pneumonia too! All because of the weird fever I suffered and consistency of it. The fever never did break and I don’t remember when – but my oxygen also had started to drop. It wasn’t as worrisome for me. I supposed, it was just lower than the acceptable norms.

But as the destiny would have it, on 2nd of May :

I simply listened to Aanand, completely expressionless and in loud coughs.

“Didi, you will have to be hospitalised,” said he informing me of the pneumonia and added,” Mum has got problems with her back and with her right leg as well.”

(Oh! — the expression was only in my mind.)

He continued, “So, although we want you to heal at home, we are left with no choice considering yours and mom’s condition. Who will take care of everything . . . and you need good care, so . . . Hospital, it is.”

“Hmm..ok,” i said and as he moved back, I dialled a friend’s number straight away, who was constant in touch with me whether or not I responded to her calls or messages. I controlled crying to avoid being audible to my brother dear.

“Hello Anshul. . . Nikki,” I heard my name and before I could answer “How are you feeling?” question, I bursted into loud tears and told her between sobs and coughs that I was to be sent to a hospital!

“Oh dear! Never mind it will be good for you. Don’t cry, I am sure you are being hospitalised for your betterment,”
she said being firm and added, “Your family knows what’s best for you… isn’t it, hm? “
” Hmm,” I nodded on the video call still whimpering.
This pragmatic friend of mine smiled at me and sobered me quick. In all my awareness, I calmed myself but of course couldn’t do anything about the deadly cough.

Actually, when I said ‘Okay’ to Aanand, I knew it was for our own good yet I couldn’t help breaking down. When I got into broken sniffles, Ms Firm Practical asked,
“Where . . . which hospital is it . . what happened exactly?” “Is your oxygen level okay?” “All well in the family?” She queued all that hastily. I informed her about pneumonia and mummy’s problem.
“You just don’t worry sweetheart, all will be well.”
“Yes, I know,” I agreed.

Just then Aanand was around again and asked me to pack my stuff.
“We have to hurry sister…”
Papa was also upstairs now and looking at ‘sad me’ spoke out,
“Beta, being at the hospital you will be better, things are not exactly under our control now. Mummy is also feeling unwell physically. Don’t worry, hm?!”
“We have booked a room at your cousin’s hospital in Barwala. There it will all be safe and fine. Aanand will stay there as well. There’s nothing to be anxious of . . I will visit you everyday too, ok?”
“And you will not have to worry or wake up just to eat there, no one will force you and we can have glucose drips etc. and get you food when you want at your comfort from sister’s home. . .” he paused and probably waited for my reply.
” Sounds fine?”
“Yes Papa, you’re right, especially about the food!” And we all laughed a little.

A visit to the Hospital

On 1st of May early noon, Aanand drove me in our sanitized car with its windows open. I sat at the back while Dad followed in another car. We were on our way to CMC Hospital. The wind was searing and the unstoppable cough made me restless and agonised. I desperately wanted to get rid of it.
In a few minutes I was at the hospital gate, waiting for dad who had gone to park the car. Aanand went straight inside the hospital to get the formalities done. While I stood there for sometime which felt like eternity, I observed the dull yet busy surroundings. It was a very hot day and there were masked people of all kinds. The patients, their family member/caretakers, the nearby food stall servers, fruit and juice sellers, people at the medical shops, passengers being dropped by autos, expressionless people, grumpy people and worried people, and people walking by for some or the other purpose in and out of the hospital. Papa was amongst the worried ones as I saw him heading toward me in long strides. All I remember of the hospital later is a faded rush except for an experience in a peculiar medical machine.

Photo by Los Muertos Crew on Pexels.com

Once inside CMC, I did whatever I was asked to do.
Cough got worse probably because it was the only thing I focused.
A hammer thumped my head and my chest hurt deep with each cough sequence. And with it everything at CMC was unbearable, but I had to finish the visit as it was supposed to take its course . . .

I sat and waited at various doors or rooms while Papa and Aanand arranged for tests or completed other formalities. My sugar levels and blood pressure were checked and suddenly, I found myself in a quick consultation with Dr Popli, one of the most reputed and trusted doctors of Hisar. There already was a patient inside when I was ushered in hastily; Aanand provided me a cover with his wide arms and I could hear disquiet patients waiting outside as if somebody deceived them. In an instant, I understood this was a special ‘emergency’ sort of an appointment since getting an appointment there is not as simple or easy as it happened.
The Doctor asked me some quick questions (I don’t remember) and I answered between terrible coughs; almost pleading him to help me get rid of it. He scribbled up something like a prescription and in a minute, I was complying to blood tests, x-rays, and what not!

Now, I have this memory of a room where I was slid into a long cylindrical device. I laid on my stomach with my forehead on a small metallic swell that appeared to be like a very hard pillow. I didn’t even feel settled when . . .
“Come on, breathe… take a long breath!” unexpectedly I heard a loud and abrupt commanding voice.
I couldn’t comprehend since the baffled upper half of me was inside that huge medical apparatus.
“Nikki, you have to take a deep breath and exhale, come on do it now!”
Busy with cough, I was like “Oh! I have to… with this cough… how do I take one long breath, how?”
.
“You hear me?” “ Breathe now.”
Ugh. I tried but coughed into a fit.
.
“Try to inhale slow… ease up,” said the voice again.
“And…now! Come on!”
.
Gosh! As if I hadn’t tried earlier. But, I gathered all my strength to control coughing and inhaled a long breath that was again unfortunately shortened by a massive cough.
.
“You have to hold your breath a little, Ms Nikki,” said a calmer voice that appeared quite near to me.
“And do it when we say – now.”
.
How I wish I could tell them I was doing my best . . .“Ok, once more Nikki,” I said to myself and at the command of “NOW,” I inhaled as much as I could. The nasty cough accompanied like before and I was told to repeat another set of inhalation. I do not remember if I exhaled any, since cough would do it on my voluntary behalf. However, I was relieved of the stress after a few trials. And once everything on that prescription was over, I was back home – safe upstairs in my room.

This visit was hard on me, I felt totally drained and do not really have any further memory of the day.

…to be continued ———————————————————————————————–